Executive Age vs Biological Age
Mar 08, 2023
When I learned that children with ADHD lag behind their peers by 30% or 3-6 years I had a new appreciation for my sons’ abilities. Perhaps that’s why they didn’t work out in a typical preschool, or failed to meet the same standards as their peers. Why there were regular meltdowns and screaming. And they both still struggle with emotional regulation. It’s a part of their disability so instead of pressuring them or shaming them to perform or calm down we have been able to get them assistance with developing his skills & celebrate his progress! Learn more below 
Executive Age vs. Biological Age
“Dr. Russell Barkley, one of the most prominent clinicians in ADHD research, calls this phenomenon the “30% Rule.” “If your child is 10,” he says, “he has the self-control of a 7-year-old.” Likewise, when he is 12 he has the self-control of an 8 year old. Oh, your child is turning 21? Her self-control skills are equivalent to that of a 14 year old.
Scared yet?
This ever-widening ADHD gap is precisely why ADHD experts do not encourage a “wait and see” approach to supporting executive function development. ADHD is not something that kids just “grow out of.”
Their ADHD executive age is determined in a different way than what we expect our child’s age to be.
In fact, if you’re truly dealing with ADHD, and your child is not actively supported to develop her executive function skills this gap will become more and more prominent and the consequences will become more and more serious.
But here’s the real kicker… As our kids age, the situations we put them into are usually appropriate for their biological age. When a child is 3, that’s not a huge difference — daycare and play dates are generally all the same for toddlers. However as they age, this mismatch between their executive maturity and the situations we put them in grows. In turn, the gap becomes more and more obvious to everyone around them.”
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